Have you ever heard anyone saying that sometimes it’s better to be single than in a wrong relationship? I have. Statistics have shown that people in an unhappy relationship are worse off than those who are single.
I can’t roll my eyes enough in relation to the amount of times I’ve met women and men desperately searching for someone because they just can’t be alone. I have to say that this is a huge problem and I’ll explain why.
Being comfortable on your own
Often when we tell people we are single, they look at us in shock. They almost feel sorry for us, like it’s some sort of disease or an infection. It isn’t and guess what? It’s absolutely OK to be single.
Being in a fruitful relationship should be a desire and not a necessity. We all have to love ourselves individually and be happy and comfortable with being in our own skin, being by ourselves and just enjoying our own company first. If we feel like dying of boredom and loneliness every time we are single then we have serious issues we need to deal with.
We as individual people have to love ourselves first before we can love anyone else. Basically, it’s impossible to really love someone the way we’re supposed to if we don’t love ourselves. Being happy with yourself means enjoying your solo time, being at peace and having the will and desire to do better for yourself without having someone around, such as looking nice and focusing on your ambitions.
Neediness is exhausting
If you are looking for someone to love first, there is a big chance that as soon as you meet somebody, you’ll get attached too much. You will become needy and sad every time they’re not around and just completely dependent on them. In other words, you will be draining them for everything they have and eventually it will become exhausting.
You won’t add any value to the relationship because you can’t even be by yourself. That kind of relationship won’t be fruitful and even if it holds together, it will mostly be because of the work the other person puts in.
Desperation leads to misery
Being desperate is never a good thing because then you will most likely end up in the wrong relationship with someone who will use, abuse and manipulate you. You will see this person as perfection when everyone else might just see them as the complete opposite.
Anxiety brings hasty decisions; never make choices based on a sense of eagerness. Eager to be in a relationship, eager to get married and the eagerness to have children can lead to real misery if you end up with the wrong person.
Everyone is different and they think differently. Some people are ambitious whilst others prefer a mediocre lifestyle. There are those who have varied cultural beliefs and others who want children while others don’t. Ending up in the wrong relationship could lead to resentment, anger, frustration and pain. Such relationships usually occur after hasty decisions when at least one of the party was driven by their fixation on ‘happily ever after’.
You shouldn’t be desperate to be in a relationship. Don’t run around like a headless chicken trying to find your other half because you’re supposed to be looking for someone to add to your life. Don’t rush into a relationship just so you can tell the world that you’re taken. Invest in your own happiness and self improvement instead, attend helpful seminars, surround yourself with positive people and try to lead a healthy balanced life.