Most of us have likely heard the phrase “He/she is married to their job”. It is an allegory often used to describe someone who is completely engrossed in their work and rarely has time for anyone else, not least their spouse.
In a constantly growing consumer based society, increased demands at the office are contributing to our work life taking priority over our relationships. Whilst having career ambitions is great, it is equally important to ensure that your work goals do not begin to negatively affect your relationships.
Such dedication to one aspect of your life runs the risk of casting doubt over your commitment to other areas. For many people, their partner’s work is like their mistress or lover, against whom they feel unwanted and abandoned.
When the desired career level is finally achieved, there is also the question of whether the power seeker’s partner still fits into the equation? With power generally comes more financial gains, and with more money comes more expensive taste. Will their modest lifestyle and outlook seem inadequate to the riches and royalties their prosperous partner now prefers?
If you find yourself in this scenario, a resolution can actually be found by referring to the basic skills we apply when approaching a problem at work.
Just like you negotiate in business, sit down with your partner and share your feelings with them. You may wish to talk about work itself, and how its demands are preventing you from spending your time how you prefer to spend it, in which case it may be time to consider a career change. Alternatively, if you are content in your current job role, this discussion is an opportunity for you both to look at how you can strike a better balance between work and personal life. With a little self-reflection and a willingness to talk, you can be successful in your career and relationship.
It is easy to become blinded by one’s own desires and goal, and in turn fail to appreciate the achievements of your other half. In the same way as you would offer encouragement to your colleagues in the office, remember to tell your partner what makes them great. We underestimate the power of acknowledgement, but a little compliment can go a long way to healing a strained relationship.
3. Look at the bigger picture
As the old business saying goes, ‘Think outside the box’. Once upon a time, you were more than just an employee. Consider what other qualities you have outside of work, and how these make you a great partner. Think back to when you first started dating and what aspects of your personality initially attracted your other half to you. Communicating and appreciating should help you find the answer. Once you have it, now begin to work on bringing your old self back out into the limelight.