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How to save a relationship?

My relationship has been going downhill for the past couple of years. My partner and I have been together for over five years, and gradually, we lost the spark. He started spending more time with his friends (or at least that’s what he says) or staying at home and playing computer games. He doesn’t want to go anywhere and do things that we used to do together. He’s cold in bed, and it seems like he lost his interest in sex. I’ve been trying to reignite the spark, make romantic dinners, and invite for weekend getaways, but he is not enthusiastic about anything. I even booked a staycation in a lovely boutique hotel, and he went along just because I said it was non-refundable. I am running out of ideas of what else can I do? It feels like I am the only one who is trying to make an effort. Can you give me some advice on how to save the relationship?

Lynne, 28
Answered by:
Clinical Hypnotherapist

You say that your relationship has been going downhill for quite some time, but I wonder if you have sat down and had a conversation about it? If not, it would be a good idea to talk calmly and clearly about how you both feel. Put some time aside and approach the conversation from a […]

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Why am I attracted to emotionally unavailable men?

I had a streak of bad luck when it comes to relationships. It seems that I attract emotionally unavailable guys who are self-centered and unable to make a commitment. I am in my mid-thirties and I was in a relationship with three men in the past. Every time I mentioned the possible future together, they drifted away saying that they are not ready for anything serious. With the last guy I tried to put up with this, but relationship without the future was not bringing me any joy, so eventually, we broke up. I am already scared that the next guy I date will be the same. Why am I attracted to emotionally unavailable men? Do available men even exist?

Caroline, 36
Answered by:
Life Coach

Hi Caroline, I want to first congratulate you on identifying the pattern of your relationships and on breaking it off when a relationship no longer brought you joy. It shows a lot of promise for building a successful relationship in the future. The good news is that available men do exist. And you can start […]

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How can I be successful in dating?

I’ve been trying to find a girlfriend for years with no luck. I am 25 now, and apart from a few dates, I’ve had no success with dating. I’ve tried various dating apps, and while I get a lot of matches and conversations going, it rarely evolves into anything else. When I try to be friendly and invite girls for a coffee, they seem to find all sorts of excuses not to meet. Picking up girls in the bars feels very superficial to me, and casual hookups are not exactly my thing. How can I be successful in dating?

Timothy, 25
Answered by:
Dating Coach & Matchmaker

Hi Timothy, This is a really good question! The answer has many layers and involves some work on your part. Here are four tips that will help you to be more successful in dating. Allow yourself to see things from a different perspective and focus on things that are working. If bars and online dating […]

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How to find out if a guy is really separated from his wife?

I've met a guy on Tinder, and we clicked right away. In the beginning, he was very chatty and eager to know me. We met a couple of times, and he seemed like an interesting person to be with. However, when he told me, he is separated, but he's still keeping in touch with his wife, I started having some doubts if dating a separated man is a good idea. I thought I'd ask more questions about his relationship status when we meet next, but then suddenly he stopped replying to my messages. He texted me again a couple of weeks later and said his life has been quite stressful recently. I started thinking maybe he got back with his ex. Is there any way to find out if the guy is really separated from his wife?

Mariella, 32
Answered by:
Divorce Lawyer

I’m sorry that you have been in limbo with this man. Dating a separated man is a tricky situation. This is particularly true if he has not made a clean break from his marriage and his wife. You can certainly check the court dockets where he lives to see if legal paperwork has been filed […]

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I never had an orgasm with my boyfriend

I’ve been dating my boyfriend for a year, and I never had an orgasm with him. In my past relationships, I usually was the first one to reach the climax, and I know that sometimes you have to show or tell him what you want, so your partner understands you. I tried hinting it at my boyfriend that I am not sexually satisfied, but he seems oblivious to it. Every time I get close to orgasm, he finishes first and then ignores all my hints. The reaction I usually get is his giggle ‘You’re insatiable,’ and if I subtly ask him to use his finger or a vibrator so I can reach my O, he wouldn’t do it. I feel quite frustrated about the sexual aspect of our relationship, which otherwise seems to be ok. Not sure what is the best thing to do in this situation.

Natalie, 29
Answered by:
Sex & Intimacy Coach

Dear Natalie, I can imagine that you are pretty frustrated about the situation, so let’s solve this! First of all, hinting never works! To get what you want with a guy, you need to be straight-forward. So no more hinting or subtle signs. You must be clear, concise, and direct. Now, I get it; you […]

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Do girls like shy guys?

I am a shy guy, and even though I have no problem socializing with people, I find it hard to approach women and to maintain a meaningful conversation. Even if I step out of my comfort zone and start chatting with a girl, I run out of topics real quick, the conversation dies, and the girl eventually excuses herself and leaves. Do girls like shy guys? What are my chances of getting a girlfriend?

Patrick, 21
Answered by:
Dating & Relationship Coach

Hi Patrick! The chances of getting a girlfriend are all within you. I know it might sound like a cliche, but here is the thing: socializing with women is not easy if you look at it as not being easy. A lot of times men put too much focus on saying the right thing and then […]

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