stressed man and a woman in the background

Some women make it their goal to stand by their partner, while others unintentionally do things that drive a man away. Other women view relationships as a power play whose ultimate goal is to create conflict and drama for fun. Women who play mind games might keep and attract the devotion of a vulnerable and gullible man for a short while, but that devotion will not last for long. Many people will not tolerate rude behavior for long. No one should have to tolerate a relationship that is constantly frustrating them.

12 most common things that drive a man away

Relationships can be tricky, and certain behaviors may unintentionally create distance between partners. So, let’s cut to the chase and explore the most common things that might drive a man away. No frills, just practical insights and strategies to help you navigate the complexities of love and build a stronger, lasting connection. Here are the most common things that drive a man away.

1. Comparing him to other men

Whether you’re trying to stir up some jealousy or anger by dropping comparisons to other men or even your ex, here’s the reality check—you’re more likely to earn a lack of respect from your man. Who wants to hang out with a partner who doesn’t appreciate them? Not me, not you, and certainly not any man expecting respect from his girlfriend or wife.

So, here’s the game plan: resist the urge to pit your guy against anyone in his orbit—brother, cousin, dad, friend—it’s a no-go. And the same goes for comparisons involving your side of the fence.

Instead, shower some appreciation on the guy for just being him. He’s got a life to live and feelings to respect. The moment you catch yourself in the comparison trap, switch gears. Open up those lines of communication, dive into his interests, and let the pride in your man shine through. That’s the winning play.

woman shouting at her partner in bed

2. Getting in the way of his life goals

We all carry dreams and goals that fuel our journey toward becoming the best versions of ourselves. Now, here’s the scoop—women who don’t respect the paths their men are carving might be unintentionally nudging them away. Ever found yourself guilty of this?

Let’s talk about selfish behavior, the silent relationship saboteur. Bombarding your guy with calls, texts, and constant attention in the hope he drops everything for you? Not the best move.

Everyone craves their personal space, your partner included. Sure, the idea of a guy who dedicates his entire life to you might seem appealing, but truth is, most men won’t sign up for that.

Your man’s got a balancing act—work, finances, friends, family—that’s his reality. Understanding his priorities and cheering him on as he chases his goals? Now that’s a game-changer. It’s about finding that sweet spot between togetherness and giving him the space he needs to navigate his own journey.

woman holding man by leg

3. Trying to change him

Ever notice those quirks in your partner’s interests that don’t quite align with yours? Maybe it’s the sports on TV or the deep dive into gaming. Those aren’t just pastimes. They are part of what makes him uniquely him.

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Now, before you start voicing your grievances, take a moment. Remember what got you hooked on him in the first place? What made your connection click? Let those positives shine a bit cheerier.

Trying to change him? Trust me, it’s like herding cats—it won’t end well. Instead, open up the lines of effective communication. Chat about your interests and find those sweet spots where your paths naturally cross.

Let your relationship be a canvas painted with the vibrant hues of individuality. Appreciate the distinct brushstrokes each of you brings. Allow your connection to grow naturally, savoring the beauty of embracing each other just as you are.

young couple playing a videogame

4. Forgetting you have a life

Having a partner allows you to explore the beauty of being together and uncover the unique things that make both of you tick. Now, spending time together is fantastic, but it might get a tad awkward if your entire world starts orbiting around him.

Give the man some breathing room to enjoy his own identity beyond the two of you. It’s reassuring to know that even with his freedom, he’s choosing to share those meaningful moments with you. Remember, before you two crossed paths, he had a whole saga of emotions and life experiences, just like you did.

And guess what? You’re also entitled to your identity and personal space outside of this partnership. You are not just a supporting character in someone else’s story. You are a leading actor with value beyond these relationship walls. Acknowledging your worth adds a whole new layer to your romance, bringing richness beyond dependency. So, embrace your independence and watch how it amplifies the beauty of your relationship.

woman writing a diary in a cafe

5. Being constantly negative

If you’re the go-to gal for consistent negative vibes, it’s no wonder your man is sending you mixed signals about his feelings.

We all have moments of frustration, but here’s the game plan: keep that cool factor as much as possible. When jealousy, negativity, and frustration start taking center stage, you’re becoming someone your boyfriend might not exactly be thrilled to have around. Instead of sparking attraction, you’re extinguishing the flames.

Next time the convo heads into heated territory, watch your words. Tone it down, sprinkle in some respect, and focus on the now. Acknowledge the concerns and insist on mutual respect. Don’t fear being weak. You can be strong without being negative.

angry young woman with crossed arms

6. Invading his space and privacy

Let’s talk about secrets—those little gems we all keep tucked away. Truth is, every person has their private moments and guilty pleasures. Now, if you’re thinking secrets are a relationship no-no, let’s hit the pause button. Your man wanting a solo movie night or diving into his favorite comics, shutting out the world for a bit? Totally cool.

Obsessing about what your partner’s up to when you’re not around? Consistent expressions of jealousy and insecurity? Now, that’s the highway to relationship trouble.

Sure, if you catch your significant other being unfaithful, it’s a different ballgame. Respond accordingly, but if your guy’s proven his loyalty, take a step back. Respect his privacy instead of pushing him away.

When he mentions solo time with friends, be understanding. Acknowledge that your guy needs his independent avenues to explore. It’s about steering clear of conflict by recognizing that he’s got his own space to navigate, and that’s perfectly okay.

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young man snoozing in hammock

7. Pushing away his offer to help

Your guy’s got a radar, you know? He can sense when something’s weighing you down, and your thoughts are treading on heavy ground. And let me drop a truth bomb— a man who truly loves you? He’s not rooting for your failure.

So, when he extends that helping hand, it’s not a random act. It’s pure love, a desire to see you thrive. He’s not in the business of watching you struggle. Now, why would you push away that offer of success and well-being?

Let love be the guiding force. When your guy steps in to help, it’s his way of showing complete devotion. Sure, pride is cool, but foolish pride won’t be your superhero in tough times. It’s about teamwork—does your guy want to witness your progress and be dismissed? It’s frustrating for him.

So, don’t slam the door the next time he expresses interest in investing in your happiness. Welcome him in, and let his support and encouragement be the threads weaving into the tapestry of your shared journey.

man helping woman to cross a river

8. Over-analyzing your relationship

Predicting where things are headed with your relationship and whether your lives sync up perfectly can be tricky. Maybe your past relationships cast a shadow, and you’re determined to break free from negative patterns, aiming for lasting happiness.

Now, it’s cool to contemplate your love match, but constantly dwelling on your relationship is not the best thing to do. In the journey together, you’ll uncover layers about your guy, and he’ll discover more about you. Taking it day by day trumps over-analyzing every moment between you two.

You might miss the full picture when you dive too deep into relationship analysis. Instead of enhancing your connection, voicing every concern through over-analysis can stir up trouble. Your guy doesn’t want to be bombarded with relationship status updates every minute. He might start dreading those communications if he senses discussions won’t be constructive. It’s about finding the balance—embracing the journey without drowning in overthought.

man and woman having a serious discussion

9. Playing games

Alright, let’s talk games. Board games, card games, sports games, those are cool. But having someone play games with your life? Not so much fun. The key to strengthening your bond with your guy is keeping it real and being ethical in your dealings, not just with him but also with friends, parents, and family. Emotional mind games? Yeah, they’re pretty much the express lane to driving men away.

We all want an ally to kick back with and feel safe. Picture living in a sketchy neighborhood where you’re scared to step outside without a weapon. Not a great scenario, right? Well, spending time with someone intentionally messing with your emotional well-being isn’t enjoyable either.

So, if you play relationship mind games, all you’ll achieve is wrecking your future with a man you love. Instead, aim to create a safe space together where you both have a say in how you want to navigate this crazy thing called a relationship.

evil woman plotting something

10. Overreacting

Processing information differently than your man is fine. But let’s talk about overreacting. Take a breath, and resist the panic button when things seem off. Pace yourself. Opt for those respectful conversations with your love. Your positive vibes? They set the tone for steering your relationship in the right direction. Trust me, your man gets uneasy when you go into overdrive over trivial stuff.

What attitudes do you both bring into this union? They’re like the compass guiding your future together. So, watch those words during your chats. Focus on what truly matters. Guys eyeing marriage and kids? They’re looking for peace in their partners. A relationship or marriage has a better shot at thriving in a progressive and peace-filled vibe. Keep the overreactions at bay and pave the way for a chill journey forward.

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When differences arise, approach them as opportunities to learn and grow together. Embrace open communication and cultivate a space where both your perspectives can coexist harmoniously.

By fostering an environment of mutual respect and genuine connection, you’ll navigate the bumps more smoothly and create a foundation for a resilient and fulfilling partnership. So, stay cool, communicate openly, and let your love story unfold gracefully and authentically.

overracting woman in couples argument

11. Being overly possessive

When desperation to cling to your relationship pushes you to dominate every moment of your guy’s time, he’s likely to slip away from those possessive clutches. Men crave their space and aren’t thrilled about constant control or jealousy.

If you were hoping your man would be flattered by possessiveness, think again—he’ll make it clear he’s not.

Jealousy? It’s a relationship wrecking ball. When women treat men like possessions instead of friends and equals, they end up pushing them away.

Men love feeling needed, but control? Not on the menu. So, watch those words and actions. Show your guy trust and believe in him. When you do, he’ll love hearing that, and chances are, he’ll prioritize taking care of you without feeling suffocated. It’s about nurturing a connection built on trust and respect.

distrustful woman pointing finger at her boyfriend

12. Expecting too much, too soon

Men and women are not always on the same schedule. You might be eyeing a family soon while he’s focused strictly on dating. It’s common for couples to feel like they speak different languages.

Feeling frustrated when your guy isn’t on your wavelength? I get it. He might pull back when he senses too much too soon, avoiding those relationship questions he’s not ready to answer yet.

Be honest with him, but be ready—no guarantee he’ll see things your way. Maybe he’s set in his ways, not looking to change.

If that’s a deal-breaker, it’s time to roll up your sleeves and find someone who aligns with your vision. The right person will make time to discuss your wants, won’t be too busy to hear you out, and will be upfront about compatibility early on. It’s about finding that connection that clicks.

You gotta reach that point where you recognize some guys are blessings while others are meant to be learning lessons. Did you have experience in the past with men who walked away? Don’t sweat it. The present matters more. Stay the course, learn from the past, and keep moving forward.

When it comes to talking with your guy, keep it respectful. Chances are, he’ll reciprocate. Don’t let yourself be strung along or disrespected, but avoid being controlling or rude in return.

Feeling uncertain about this relationship journey? Maybe consider a dating coach or relationship therapist. They can help you attract and maintain a relationship with the right guy.

Akua is a Canadian born and raised girl with Caribbean roots. She is a journalist, actress, music teacher, performer, owner and marketer of 3 worldwide dating websites, as well as an independent Pure Romance business owner selling passion products for singles and couples.

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