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Setting boundaries

The guy that I met on a dating site recently attempted to make a move on the first date. I tried setting boundaries by telling him that I am not in the mood for one night stands. A few days later he asked me out again that I took as a sign he sees something more in me than just a hook up material. I was way more relaxed and we kissed, but then he texted me suggesting to be ‘just friends’. He is a fun person to be around with and while I value his friendship, I am attracted to him physically so now things are a bit awkward. I enjoy his company and I wouldn’t mind taking things further, it just seems that he is not interested in me as in a woman any more and he friendzoned me irreversibly. Have I done the wrong thing trying to slow things down and get to know each other before jumping to bed?

Lauren, 31
Answered by:
Relationship and Lifestyle Coaches

Dear Lauren, it appears Mr. One-Night-Stand isn’t looking for a relationship based on the information you have provided. Here is why: First, he tried to make a move on the initial date without learning about who you are. Trying to hook-up on the same night you meet in real life is a good sign he […]

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How to banter

I simply don't know how to say the flirty things to women in a genuine, authentic and playful way. No words come to me during chit-chat that resemble flirting or bantering. Using canned lines isn't a way I'd like to go. I realise this is important, but I don't know how to start flirting with women without it being awkward or accidentally creepy. If you have any suggestions on how to get better at flirting I would really appreciate it.

Nathan, 22
Answered by:
Dating Coach, Author, TV & Radio Personality

I have a quick and easy way to find your flirt and learn how to banter without coming across as creepy. But first I want to give you a mini lesson on banter so that you get a full understanding of what it is and why it’s so important to women. Bantering is defined as “The […]

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Dating a younger man

I’ve stared dating a younger man and things seem to be simply amazing: we share similar views and values, have the same sense of humour, respect each other and have lots of fun together. He said that he feels happy with me and so do I. In fact, this may be the most rewarding relationship I’ve ever been in. However, when I brought up the topic of our potential future together, he became very hesitant and even suggested we keep our relationship open which was totally unexpected to me. I am 6 years older and ready for a commitment, while he hints he needs more time to think about it. I don’t want to push things, but waiting around until he makes up his mind let alone dates other women to convince himself if he wants to be with me does not feel right. What should I do?

Deborah, 36
Answered by:
Dating, Commitment Issues & Romance Adviser

Dating a younger man is quite a dilemma that you find yourself in! You have met a nice guy who you feel comfortable with and who you envision building a future with, and you want to drive the relationship with him forward while he wants to slam on the brakes. This is a man who […]

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Talking to women without being creepy

I can talk to women in bars (where it’s expected) but often I’ll see a really attractive woman in a store or a café that I’d love to meet. How can I do this without being creepy?

Thomas, 26
Answered by:
Dating & Lifestyle Coach

Firstly, the fact that you’re concerned about being creepy is already a great start. It means that you’ll approach the situation with care and social intelligence. I recommend my clients to always start talking to women with “Excuse me …” I believe this gets the woman’s attention and gives her a moment to register you […]

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My partner doesn’t want to wear condoms

This guy I am hooking up with hates to wear condoms during sex. Every time I ask him to he has a different excuse. We have had unprotected sex a few times, so he doesn't understand why I still want him to wear one. I feel bad when I ask him to and he seems annoyed. I know I'm not the only person he is hooking up with so I'm worried what can happen as well as fearful of getting pregnant. How can I make him wear a condom without feeling bad?

Leah, 23
Answered by:
Clinical Sexologist, Psychotherapist & Certified Sex Therapist

Leah, what you are experiencing is common for many women. Guys don’t like to wear condoms during sex for many different reasons. However, there is no excuse he can use that is good enough to skip wearing protection. This is your body and you have complete control over it. Don’t feel bad because you want […]

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Trouble approaching women

I have a hard time approaching women. I like going out with my friends, but when it comes to striking up a conversation with a woman that I like I can’t bring myself to make the first move. Every time I go out with the intention to approach girls, I freeze. How do I overcome my anxiety?

Jayden, 23
Answered by:
International Dating Crash Test Dummy

Please don’t think that you are alone with this problem of approaching women. In fact, this is the number one sticking point my coaching clients struggle with. But let me tell you a secret. Approach anxiety is not the real issue of your problem. I know. That might sound confusing, but let me ask you […]

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