Listen up, guys. I’m a single girl who has recently taken the plunge back into the world of dating. And seeing as I had never really gone on a proper date before, first dates are new and becoming a regular event in my social calendar.
With technology, and Tinder, and busy lives, dating feels like my second job! So I’m a girl here to help a guy out. No one wants a bad date, so maybe having an insight into a girl’s mind before the date has even begun will help you on the road to becoming less of a serial dater and more of a dating don.
I love going on dates. And most girls do. Who doesn’t love the potential of meeting someone amazing? What I don’t love is the effort that a girl has to put in when getting ready for a date.
Now, I know what you’re thinking if a lady was going on a first date, why would she have to shave her legs? And if she does, is this the type of girl you’re looking for?
Don’t jump to conclusions and thoughts of getting lucky fellas. Focus!
No girl wants to be panicking that her date can see her winter legs poking through her tights. Being her best self includes removing every inch of hair and covering every blemish, and just generally spending a good few hours buffing, waxing, plucking, painting, and moisturizing just so she feels the best version of herself she can be.
It may be enough for you to just have a quick shave and a spritz of cologne to be date ready, and us ladies aren’t judging you for that. I’m sure, if we could get away with such a quick beauty regime we would. But just know that is not the case. It takes a lot of products to be this pretty.
The perfect outfit
When a girl is asked out you can almost guarantee that the first question she asks herself is ‘What am I going to wear?’
The panic ensues, with hours of trying on every possible combination of outfits in their wardrobe, and maybe a scroll or two through online shopping. Then photos of potential outfits clog up precious Icloud storage (when it should be being used on cute puppy pictures and other very important things) as we ladies send our clothing options to our friends for a second opinion.
So on your next first date, a good way to go is to compliment something your date is wearing. She didn’t just throw something on that was lying on her bedroom floor (however, if you were to ask, acting aloof would follow).
Our lives are now so public online, that it only takes a few clicks and a Facebook search or two to find the person who just asked you out. Before you even agree to meet them, you can have such an honest look into their lives in mere minutes. Every Instagram picture they’ve taken, every post they’ve shared, and even videos of them being wasted, downing a pint as a challenge, and projectile vomming everywhere. *
* I wish that was fictional. I actually witnessed that! I didn’t date them!
I’m not saying don’t post anything. It’s a free internet world. However, if you’re on a love quest maybe just think about who can see what you put on social media. Or at least be good with your privacy settings.
Obviously, there has to be an initial conversation to even see whether there is any spark. But these days, with dating apps and texting being a big part of getting to know someone before you ask them out, every text message sent can be crucial. It is brutal but I have definitely thought someone had date potential and one text has completely changed my mind about that person. Every word that you have been sent from that girl you’ve been exchanging messages with has been meticulously thought through. That’s a lot of message drafts saved. Just stay clear of anything too full on. It’s better to keep deep conversation for face-to-face situations!
Then you have the conversation on the actual date. You have to make sure there won’t be any lulls so you can’t reveal everything within texts.
In fact the fewer texts the better.
Research into online dating shows that people who exchange less chat in texts are more likely to physically meet and go on an actual date. If you keep a long back and forth exchange, the conversation usually dies out, texts become less frequent and before you know it, it’s as if they never existed.
So stop texting and start dating: find out a few key things to see if there is potential and then arrange a meet-up. Because you can never know you like someone until you see if sparks fly in the presence of each other.
The friend’s opinion
Every element that has gone into this date has most probably been approved by a close-knit group of your date’s friends. And I mean everything. That is a lot of glasses of wine and hours of analysis of every message you’ve sent her and what outfit will be the best one to wear. The friends have basically held your new date’s hand through all of the above steps.
Now I’ve shown you a little insight into what can go on in a women’s brain when she is getting ready for a date before she even takes the leap. Next time you make a passing comment to take a girl out, remember fellas, there are probably hours going into that before an actual meet-up has been established. Make sure your offer is a genuine one!