unconventional relationship

Have you noticed that there are obstacles in every fairy tale story? Cinderella’s obstacle was her vindictive step-mother. Snow White’s obstacle was the jealous queen. Many happy relationships have obstacles. Have there been obstacles in your love life? If so, the moral of the story in your love life should be that you need to make the right decisions for you. Some people in your life might be opposed to the life choices that you are making, but that doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t be making those choices.

Some of the people who you meet might be from a different cultural background from yourself, and you’re not sure if you should take the risk and pursue a relationship with someone whose life experiences are so different to yours. Or, perhaps you’re considering getting involved with someone who was previously involved with one of your friends or family members. How do you know whether or not it’s worth it to pursue an unconventional relationship?

You’ll feel good knowing that you followed your heart

There are so many people who are part of this planet that we call earth, and there are many different scenarios you could find yourself in. If you have ever been in an age gap match (a relationship where you and your partner have an age difference of 10 years or more), an interracial pairing, and any other type of unconventional relationship where few people in your life approve of it, you are probably tired of having to defend your reasons for making your choices. Finding and keeping love is challenging enough when it seems as though everything is on your side. But if you put in the time and effort, your unconventional relationship could become a huge blessing in your life, and it could be exactly what you need.

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A few years ago I wrote and published an article on the topic of whether or not it was okay to date your former brother-in-law. My article was focused on all of the reasons to “go for it” and pursue what the heart wants. I was surprised by the positive feedback that I received from readers worldwide about that article. I didn’t expect to get emails from people who had been in “scandalous” situations like that, but I received messages from women and from men who had followed their hearts and pursued relationships that none of their loved ones supported. The readers who wrote me thanked me for shedding light on the fact that some relationships that start out seemingly scandalous can turn into healthy and productive partnerships.

I`ve never dated a man who was involved with one of my family members, but I have dated someone who was involved with one of my friends. To me, it`s natural and understandable for two people to bond and grow closer when they have mutual connections. I figured that if it worked for the character of Brooke Logan on the American soap opera The Bold and the Beautiful to follow her heart, then it was fine for anyone else. I still feel that it`s important to follow your heart. I see no reason to avoid being with someone who could add lots of happiness to your life just because your relationship isn`t conventional.

You’ll gain strength and develop valuable skills

Challenges help you to learn and grow. An unconventional relationship will shake your world like nothing else! Through this type of relationship, you can learn different points of view, be bold, and become the person who you were meant to become. A relationship without challenges can become a stale and boring; you may find yourself losing interest in it.

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Part of the excitement of having a career versus having a job is that a career motivates you to develop and grow your skills. A job is something you do to pay bills and make ends meet. An unconventional relationship is like a career in the sense where there is plenty of motivation to make an unlikely pairing function and thrive. There are daily opportunities to learn and grow in unconventional relationships. You may also realise that you’re fortunate to have the bravery to allow yourself to experience something that few people allow themselves to do.

You will inspire others

Your decision to be in a unique relationship can inspire other people to do that same. I never understood why some women refuse to date men who are shorter than they are. One of my friends who is married told me that if her and her husband ever separated, she would join a dating site for tall singles that I had told her about. My friend is tall, her husband is tall, and she told me more than once that she couldn’t respect the man she’s involved with if he wasn’t at least as tall as she is.

I’m not a tall person, but I’m not particular about a man’s height. In fact, I’ve always preferred men who were around my height, slightly shorter or slightly taller than I am. When a man is very tall, it’s awkward for me to give him a hug, and to me, cuddles are important! I wouldn’t be bothered in the slightest if a man I was seeing was shorter than me. In fact, I’d think it was cute and unique. I enjoy seeing couples where the woman is taller than the man. I think it’s time to end height discrimination in dating life, and I’m not afraid to date a shorter man.

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Not all relationships are like fairy tales, and every single relationship has at least one obstacle. Have you backed down from pursuing someone who you know you’re attracted to because that person doesn’t fit the “image” that you have in your mind of who you thought you’d be with? I think it’s time for each single person to be more brave and pursue the one who causes their hearts to flutter. Getting involved with someone for superficial reasons such as wanting the approval of other people, is bound to backfire. Relationships that are built on substance and perseverance will impact the world and motivate people to be courageous and to live their lives their way.

Akua is a Canadian born and raised girl with Caribbean roots. She is a journalist, actress, music teacher, performer, owner and marketer of 3 worldwide dating websites, as well as an independent Pure Romance business owner selling passion products for singles and couples.

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