I’ve heard it said on many occasions that going on your first holiday together, especially if you’re not living together, is a true test of your relationship. Funnily enough, I actually believe this. It’s a true test for you as a couple.
Me and my partner went on our first holiday together to Amsterdam. It was a big learning curve for us both, even though it was only for a long weekend. I learnt so much more about my other half in such a short space of time.
Don’t put pressure
Try not to put pressure on yourselves about making your first holiday a once-in-a-lifetime style perfect holiday. It isn’t going to happen! Unless of course, you are one of those amazing Instagram travel bloggers. The thing is if you’re in this for the long haul then you’ll (hopefully) go on tonnes of different and amazing holidays over the course of your lives together. Don’t sweat it!
Discuss your budget
There’s nothing worse than going on holiday and overspending or stressing over how much money you have left after day six. To avoid this potential added headache, have the conversation beforehand. Make sure you both agree on how much cash you want to take with you and how you will pay for things when you’re away. We were open and honest with each other before we went away, which saved on having awkward conversations whilst you’re there. It just means you can enjoy travelling with your partner bit more.
Agree on shared activities
Before we jetted off to Amsterdam, my other half expressed an interest in doing a few activities whilst we were there. This was great because it meant we could plan our limited days and get in as much as we could. Everyone has different expectations of a holiday. It’s best to have this conversation because we could have spent three days just purely sightseeing instead of fitting in things like going on a boat tour, trying the Amsterdam bikes or dining at Senses (the most incredible restaurant ever). Oh and don’t forget, compromise is super important. Activities are a great way to discover what the other person likes (and doesn’t like)!
Don’t dwell on negativity
Even if you have lived together, or stayed over at the other persons home, a holiday will introduce you to a whole other world of intimacy! Spending all day with one person, every day for a week, two weeks or more can take some getting used to. Just to make a point guys, unfortunately it’s not going to be one continuous steamy bedroom marathon either. We all love holidays but people still get tired, sick, grumpy, bored and all the rest when they’re away from home. It’s better to just accept this and not to take it personally. If you’re spending your whole lives together, you will encounter times like this; take a deep breath and move forward. Don’t dwell on negativity.
Have your personal time
I remember our first long holiday together. We went to Greece and it was amazing! Despite us spending a full week together, we still took time apart. There were days where I wouldn’t want to lay in the sun for much longer and took myself to the pool bar, grabbed a drink and read my book, whilst he swam. Either that or I stayed on the sun lounger whilst he took a surfboard into the ocean. Having time apart is just as important and healthy in any relationship. It doesn’t mean you don’t love them or want to spend time with them, sometimes it’s just nice to do things by yourself.
It’s easy to forget how much forward planning and organising there is when it comes to holidays. From booking your flights, printing off itineraries and making sure you both have your travel documents, to things like arranging airport pick-ups or asking for a table in a restaurant. Share responsibilities. If one of you knows more of the local language, then ask for a table or handle buying food. If one of you is more organised, take on checking in for flights and hotels. It’s important to share responsibilities.
Minimise travel stress
My other half is a stickler for planning and preparing for any trip well in advance, and he does it right. Always prepare for the journey to minimise last-minute problems, such as getting 10 minutes down the road and realising you don’t have your passport… (*coughs*). Let me tell you, when you’re stuck on the motorway en route to the airport and you hit traffic backed up for miles, you really find out about how the other deals with stress!
Do what I do in that moment and just keep calm, breathe deep and slow and bite your tongue! If you both stress out it only makes the situation worse. The best thing you can do, or your other half can do, depending on who is stressing more, is to be patient and level headed for the two of you. Trust me it helps and works a dream! You don’t want to have your first argument before you’ve even checked your baggage onto the flight.
Avoid picking arguments
The thing with being on holiday is, you can’t escape or go for a cool off at your own home etc. You’re with each other for quite some time and if you normally live apart, it can be tough. If your other half is really getting on your nerves, it’s wise not to unleash hell on them, especially on holiday! Try and stay in control of your emotions and if you have a problem, just talk to them. Trust me, it’s so much easier to talk it out than to start picking fights in scorching heat!
It’s simple really: just damn well enjoy it! It may be your first of many fantastic trips you go on together. Whether you decide to do city breaks, sunny holidays, skiing holidays or round the world trip, all the same rules apply. At the end of the day if you love each other and you’re meant to be together, any problems you may face you’ll work through them.