Does it sometimes feel like the world is divided up between guys who have no trouble with women and guys who can’t get a date with a woman at all, no matter how hard they try? Maybe you consider yourself to be handsome, but always seem to be fresh out of luck when it comes to girls. And it doesn’t even seem to matter that the guy with all the luck would appear to be much less attractive to women than the guy who is literally getting nowhere.

So if looks aren’t the key to the door, what is it about a man that makes women go weak at knees, submitting to him, hanging on his every word, and giving him what he wants? Guys, if you want to know what it is about you and your species that makes you attractive to women, read on.

1. Confidence

Confidence is the magic potion that makes most women take note of you. Confidence is the reason you see seemingly unattractive men walking around with beautiful women. If you’re secure and comfortable with yourself, you instantly become more attractive. Put it this way: If you think you’re awesome and let everyone know this, pretty soon she’ll have no other option but to believe you! When you have confidence, you’re pretty much shaking a magic wand at a woman. Ask and it shall be given. She’s as good as yours.

2. Romance

You might have been told that romance is dead. And among some guys, it is. But this just means that when you come along with flowers, bath bombs, chocolates, and flight tickets for a weekend getaway (I’m exaggerating, you don’t need to go that far – randomly stopping by with some of her favorite treats is just as good), she’s going to be bowled over. No one’s treated her like this for a long time (if ever!). A lot of girls have forgotten what it’s like to be romanced because so many guys just don’t act like the classic romantic anymore. If you can come along and give her compliments, smooch with her careless whispers, romantic gestures, and a room full of candles, she is going to react (in a good way). Romance is easily one of the most attractive qualities in a man that no woman can resist.

3. Vulnerability

Never made yourself vulnerable to a woman because you were scared it would expose you or – worse still – make you less of a man in her eyes? No way! Women want a man to be vulnerable. It shows her that she can trust you, that you’re in touch with your emotions, and that you trust her enough to open up.  It beats a posing, preening “man’s man” any day of the week.

4. Intelligence

Got things to say? So use it and say it! It’s okay to play dumb once in a while and act the fool. A lot of women like clowns who can make them laugh. But they don’t generally see themselves lasting the distance with a guy who is dumb for real. It might be okay for a week, but she’ll soon get bored. Women crave stimulating conversation. They want to be able to talk with you about the latest book they read, a podcast or their dreams. And you know what? They even want you to challenge them from time to time on their ideas. Rather than just say, “that’s sweet, honey. Now can I get back to the ball game?”

5. Patience

Revelation – women can be hard work! That’s not a criticism, it’s an observation. Hey, guys can be hard work, too. Most of my female friends (and me included) absolutely love it when a guy has patience in reserve. It’s one of the most attractive qualities in a man that no woman can resist. If you show a woman you’re willing to be patient with her, she might even fall in love with you.

6. Humor

You probably already knew this, but it’s worth repeating. If you go on dating sites and present yourself as a mysterious, serious as heck person, the jig will wear thin pretty quickly. Women like jokers; men who can make them roll over in an attack of the giggles. Like Will Smith once said, “if you can make her laugh, the next step is sex.” And while sex isn’t always the next step, you’ll definitely be on your way.