It’s no surprise that after a while sex can become boring and repetitive. Believe it or not, this happens to everyone in a long term relationship. You always do the same thing over and over again and it’s not exciting anymore. It’s boring and you know what to expect from your partner. You crave for something new to give you that heat and desire again.
It’s nothing to be ashamed of, this happens to the best of us. We’re only human and we all want something new and exciting to happen. Here are six ways to help spice up your sex life.
1. Get some sex toys
If you’ve never tried sex toys before, the thought of using them might sound scary. I assure you it is far from it. Using sex toys doesn’t only make your sex life more exciting but also makes for better sex overall. The use of vibrators, dildos or for you more adventurous lot butt plugs can create a night of great sex with your partner.
Start off with something for beginners, such as a small vibrator and use it on yourself first. There is no shame in using sex toys and they can help you to have a great orgasm. When you are comfortable with this get your partner to use it on you. This gives them the power to control your orgasm and tease you for a night of better sex. Or better yet get your partner to watch while you use this sex toy on yourself. This will sure make things heated in the bedroom very quickly and leave him wanting you desperately.
2. Try bondage
Bondage is another thing that many people perceive as scary. However, it can be extremely pleasurable for both you and your partner. The one thing that you have to have with your partner is trust. You rely on them to be your eyes, ears, and hands when you are otherwise tied up.
There are two types of bondage; light and hard bondage. For beginners who have never tried this before start off with light spanking and blindfolds. Or you can tie your partner up with handcuffs or a simple tie. This makes it exciting because you cannot move or see and this heightens your other senses and makes the experience all that more pleasurable.
If you decide to take things further, you can use a variety of things to make for a great night: spreader bars, ball gags, whips, and floggers. And that’s just the beginning. These can be used on yourself or your partner, depending on how comfortable you are with each other. Now I must say since using these during sex, I have had a much better experience and enjoyed myself a lot more. Like many of you, my sex life was dull before using sex toys and bondage. Now my sex drive is higher and I have gained a lot of confidence which is key when experimenting with new ideas in your bedroom.
3. Practice dirty talk
Whispering some naughty things to your partner during sex seems pretty obvious to try, but many of us find it awkward and uncomfortable at first. This is totally ok, we’ve all been there. Dirty talk makes the experience a lot more exciting and it can also boost your confidence in the bedroom.
Dirty talk is also a good way to communicate to your partner about what you want and what you like. This means that you can skip the process of doing certain acts of pleasure which you don’t really find that pleasurable. You can start off with something simple like “you’re so hot” or “you turn me on.” Then when you get more comfortable with dirty talk you can tell your partner in detail about what you know they will like. In my opinion, dirty talk is super exciting. I like my partner to be vocal and tell me what they’ve got in store for me. This is also a massive turn on because it leaves you in anticipation of what your partner will do.
Now, this might not be for everyone, but there is no harm in trying something that’s outside of your comfort zone. Don’t be afraid to experiment and explore what drives you and your partner wild.
4. Engage in roleplay
The first time I tried roleplay in the bedroom was hilarious: my first experience of being spanked by a ruler ended up with it snapping in half and a lot of laughing on my part.
A couple of years later when I got over that terrible first try of roleplay I have found something I am comfortable doing. Role play doesn’t necessarily mean bad student and teacher or a police officer. This can mean something as simple as being dominant with your partner. This makes it easier as it is a broader category where you can change it to fit with you as an individual.
Being dominant is challenging at first but when you build up the confidence to try this it makes you feel so powerful and sexy. This is key because you realize that your partner is submitting to you and is ready for you to take control. Being dominant can range from something simple like ordering your partner around to something a little more intense like choking and using collars. Either is exciting and anyone who tries this will find that their sex life has changed for the better.
5. Wear something sexy
Wearing something sexy can be the difference between good sex and great sex. This is a key confidence booster in the bedroom and can drive your partner crazy. You can wear something as simple as lacy underwear in your partner’s favorite color. Or something a bit more risqué like crotchless underwear or corsets. You can always change and mix it up to keep your partner on their toes.
Ever since embracing wearing sexy clothes, I have discovered an abundance of sexual confidence within myself. This helps me to feel comfortable with my partner and if I feel good, he feels good too.
Wearing sexy lingerie is the simplest yet most effective thing to do when having sex. It helps those who are not as confident to see yourself as attractive and desirable. Your partner surely loves confidence on you and with a little bit extra, such as sexy lingerie you’ve got the ultimate desirable weapon on your hands.
6. Tease and indulge in foreplay
Many of us are guilty of skipping the foreplay and teasing and getting straight to having sex. But why would you miss out on the most fun part? Teasing and foreplay are very effective and can result in amazing sex.
Both you and your partner can do the little things you like to get each other excited and ready to have sex. Teasing is fun because you can explore each other’s breaking points when teasing becomes too much. You see the effect you have on your partner and know it’s you that did that and made them feel that way. This feeling is incredibly empowering.
Foreplay helps to build sexual tension between you and your partner. It’s like stepping stones towards the final goal, which is obviously sex. Foreplay enables you to explore each other’s bodies and makes you feel good. When both of you are at your breaking point it makes having sex more pleasurable and intense.
There are many more ways to entice you and your partner to have better sex. The list of things to do in your sexual relationship is endless, as long as you are willing to be adventurous and explore the boundaries of pleasure.